Entry tags:
- !event,
- arcane: silco,
- arknights: gavial,
- black butler: sebastian michaelis,
- culture (the): demeisen,
- divinity original sin: fane,
- enderal: jade the prophetess,
- expanse (the): amos burton,
- fate grand order: tezcatlipoca,
- fate/: rin tohsaka,
- fate/: sakamoto ryouma,
- fire emblem: shez,
- fire emblem: yuri leclerc,
- forgotten realms: raphael,
- howl's moving castle: howl,
- jinba: hayame,
- legend of zelda (the): link,
- life is strange: chloe price,
- oc: liem talbott,
- oc: matt jamison,
- pumpkin scissors: alice l. malvin,
- suikoden: yuber,
- terra e: tony asuka,
- tsubasa reservoir chronicle: subaru
THE ADVOCATE ORACLE - A RIP VAN WINKLE IN TIME
Sweet dreams are made of Bliss
As the twilight falls, and bearers begin to tuck in for their evenings on the night of the 15th of March (OOC time) and whether they tuck themselves into bed fully, or simply drift away in the middle of their dinner, work, indulgences, or what have you; bearers will fall into a deep, deep sleep. Perhaps you slump in your chair, or you wrap your arms around a teddy bear, or partner, or cup a precious shard in your sleep, it doesn’t matter, because as you drift away, into a sleep that seems to tug you under like the undertow itself, a question will echo in bearer’s minds: “If given the choice, would you show compassion in the face of adversity?”
It sticks with you, even as you fall into a dreamless sleep. As if it rotates in your mind, over and over, letting you worm over that. You know for certain what it is, that it is the calming, soothing voice of the Oracle, reaching out to you across the ether, telling you – promise you – that if you accept its promise, you will find that the Oracle could be in your hands. That thought leads you to dream of something else – of home, or your loved ones – of what you are fighting this war for. Even as you dream, you feel a presence next to you, and unlike the Harbinger’s winding, rough digging, this is more akin to a friend, who is asking you soft, coaxing questions. Things like: what was your childhood like? What were your friends like? What did you do? You cannot help but think of them, think of your home and your loved ones. Of where you came from, and how it made you what you are.
The advocate seeks to understand you, and where you come from. You can feel it, that overwhelming Acceptance and love from it, even as you reminisce, compelled to answer the multitude of questions, you can feel something building behind you, around you. “Don’t you want them all to understand this?” the impression is given through communion, and you cannot help but answer: yes.
It sticks with you, even as you fall into a dreamless sleep. As if it rotates in your mind, over and over, letting you worm over that. You know for certain what it is, that it is the calming, soothing voice of the Oracle, reaching out to you across the ether, telling you – promise you – that if you accept its promise, you will find that the Oracle could be in your hands. That thought leads you to dream of something else – of home, or your loved ones – of what you are fighting this war for. Even as you dream, you feel a presence next to you, and unlike the Harbinger’s winding, rough digging, this is more akin to a friend, who is asking you soft, coaxing questions. Things like: what was your childhood like? What were your friends like? What did you do? You cannot help but think of them, think of your home and your loved ones. Of where you came from, and how it made you what you are.
The advocate seeks to understand you, and where you come from. You can feel it, that overwhelming Acceptance and love from it, even as you reminisce, compelled to answer the multitude of questions, you can feel something building behind you, around you. “Don’t you want them all to understand this?” the impression is given through communion, and you cannot help but answer: yes.
Click your Heels together, Dorothy!
As you awake for the first time, it’s alien, the world that meets you. New smells fill your nostrils, new sights, the gravity is perhaps different than you’ve gotten used to on Kenos, even those slight shifts enough to make the world feel wholly different. You remember the advocate’s words, and it wants you to feel what it feels. Understanding. Compassion, and perhaps there is a sense that doing so would hurt yourself in turn, if you understood too much. That is the advocate’s way, after all, isn’t it?
You feel an inexorable, slight tug in your chest. Something subtle and gentle, the slightest of sensations, that gives you a direction. You know it, your mind only just now comprehending the advocate’s confusing impressions via communion, that there is something of this world’s… Soul/center/heart or whatever word you want to use for it. Something about this world that will help you along your path, and help you with the results you so desire. You know it will not guarantee a victory, but surely it will help. Especially as your numbers dwindle from world to world. You are left with an impression from the Advocate -- if you die, they cannot bring you back. There is apology in this, but alone, one oracle is limited. Only united, can they truly change your fate.
The lingering presence of the advocate starts to fade. You know this is a bearer’s world, if not your own. You look around, to see perhaps a familiar face nearby? Or perhaps you are alone. Does it matter? You know that this place belongs to a bearer, but whether they are a friend or an enemy, one has to begin to determine that. You’ll need your wits, you’ll need your strength and resolve to make it to the end of this, won’t you?
After all, as bearers were recently reminded: this is War. This is not simply the fate of this world, but perhaps all, as it will require you to find the answer to this question. So you start to move, you start to look around, explore, and search. For the soul of each world, for the bearers that lie dreaming within, and your foes that will seek you out. Stay steadfast, for the way out will come, if you make it to the end. The longer you spend in each world, however, the more the shadows look darker, and deeper. Hungrier. The more the spaces seem smaller or compressed. As if there is something gnawing away at the sides, making their way to the heart.
You feel an inexorable, slight tug in your chest. Something subtle and gentle, the slightest of sensations, that gives you a direction. You know it, your mind only just now comprehending the advocate’s confusing impressions via communion, that there is something of this world’s… Soul/center/heart or whatever word you want to use for it. Something about this world that will help you along your path, and help you with the results you so desire. You know it will not guarantee a victory, but surely it will help. Especially as your numbers dwindle from world to world. You are left with an impression from the Advocate -- if you die, they cannot bring you back. There is apology in this, but alone, one oracle is limited. Only united, can they truly change your fate.
The lingering presence of the advocate starts to fade. You know this is a bearer’s world, if not your own. You look around, to see perhaps a familiar face nearby? Or perhaps you are alone. Does it matter? You know that this place belongs to a bearer, but whether they are a friend or an enemy, one has to begin to determine that. You’ll need your wits, you’ll need your strength and resolve to make it to the end of this, won’t you?
After all, as bearers were recently reminded: this is War. This is not simply the fate of this world, but perhaps all, as it will require you to find the answer to this question. So you start to move, you start to look around, explore, and search. For the soul of each world, for the bearers that lie dreaming within, and your foes that will seek you out. Stay steadfast, for the way out will come, if you make it to the end. The longer you spend in each world, however, the more the shadows look darker, and deeper. Hungrier. The more the spaces seem smaller or compressed. As if there is something gnawing away at the sides, making their way to the heart.
Around the world in 60 seconds 12 hours
When you find yourself at the end, when you close your eyes – only a blink, but it hangs, as if the momentary motion is enough to suspend you into a suspended space before. You can see the two options stretched out before you – metaphysically – the impression of it. A long, long shadow cast over one. As if there is a presence hovering over and above, like waiting jaws, ready to strike. In the other, there remains…nothing. It is not pleasant, it is not comforting, it simply… is. A sense that there is now a lack of anything, almost like it had never existed before.
Does this world have value? You can feel the Advocate ask. Do you want to give them a chance to live? Or does should this world cease, is there nothing here to save?
And though you are compelled, required to answer, you know this question for what it is. Short-sighted. Both, in the end, will lead to its destruction, but which will you choose? Will you allow the world to continue, even with that long shadow cast, like a hungry beast with snapping jaws; or will you erase it from existence and spare it that oncoming apocalypse?
Does this world have value? You can feel the Advocate ask. Do you want to give them a chance to live? Or does should this world cease, is there nothing here to save?
And though you are compelled, required to answer, you know this question for what it is. Short-sighted. Both, in the end, will lead to its destruction, but which will you choose? Will you allow the world to continue, even with that long shadow cast, like a hungry beast with snapping jaws; or will you erase it from existence and spare it that oncoming apocalypse?
Catch [???] Winks
The last world’s fate decided, bearers float in an endless sea of stars. You can see them all, spread before you. Intermittently, they wink out, swallowed into the darkness, consumed as the shadows, that inky-black nothingness grows ever-larger. It looks upon you, bearers. It is nothing, but you have its attention, and your blood runs cold, your limbs frozen. You cannot move, you cannot speak, you cannot breathe. You feel it, the power of being drawn into it, like it wants to consume you. Like it knows you.
T̸̢̼̯͓̬̘́̀̋̆͊h̷͔̣̱̝͍̬̣͕̄̂͗̆͒͌͜ͅẹ̶̱̩̅͒̿̇͠ ̵̭̹͇͖̔̀ṃ̸̢̧͙̟̼̜͌͆̍͝͝ͅo̴̟̞̓̆̇̐̆͊̽͆̂̀r̶͈̺̮̠͙̗͌ę̸̤̻̈́͐͂̓̊͐̂͆ ̵̡̛͎̩̳̤͔͚̱̼̆̒̓y̴̺̞̹̺̝̤͂ǫ̷̡̣̱̥͊̈́̓͑̕͘ű̵̼͜͜ ̶̨̨̝̟̘̱͇̲̻̪̊͂̽̈̒͊f̴̱̐͌̌̓̋̔́̀͝i̶͖̤͎̬̝̦͒̂g̸̳̰̟̀̓̽̈́̐h̸̼͍̮͎̊̅͗͊̈͋̽̀͘t̴͔͚́̓,̷̨̧̱̠̙̠̙̱̒̍̽̾ ̷̖̰̼̬̟͐̊̂t̶̖̄͂̅̃̍͐̊̑̅͜͝h̴̢̛͙̪̞̫̝̺̋̅̿͛̇̚͝͝ͅͅȩ̶͉̤͍̠́̈͑̏͋̚͘͝ ̸̢̨̧͚̖̤̪̬̪̀̉̐͗̂͆͑̚̕̚c̴̠̩̳͎̲̪͔̟̈́͂̉͑́l̶̡̲̻̣̘̏́ͅo̶̢̧͔͈̬̳̰͈̝̻͌̋̆̃͒͗̏͘ş̴̪̺̣̥̎̽̿͗̒́͛̕̚̚e̴̺͍̤͖͂̇͑͂̋͂̆̾r̴̨̩̈́͋͠ ̷̧͚̲̩̖̋͒̉́͗y̶̘̖̝̑̈͊ǒ̵͚̽u̵͎͍̇̀̏̊̕͝ŕ̷͎̜̘͙̀̋ ̶͇̲̝̞̖̝̣̘̝̬͋d̷͔͈͔̀̿õ̴̝̯͇̹̘̏͗͜ö̵͚͓͆m̵͉̦̫̥̦̞̫͐̆͐̿͊͒͌͋͜.̷̼͈̻̥̜̾̏͐̾̐͆͘͜
You gasp, as you startle awake, and open your eyes for the first time in a long time.
T̸̢̼̯͓̬̘́̀̋̆͊h̷͔̣̱̝͍̬̣͕̄̂͗̆͒͌͜ͅẹ̶̱̩̅͒̿̇͠ ̵̭̹͇͖̔̀ṃ̸̢̧͙̟̼̜͌͆̍͝͝ͅo̴̟̞̓̆̇̐̆͊̽͆̂̀r̶͈̺̮̠͙̗͌ę̸̤̻̈́͐͂̓̊͐̂͆ ̵̡̛͎̩̳̤͔͚̱̼̆̒̓y̴̺̞̹̺̝̤͂ǫ̷̡̣̱̥͊̈́̓͑̕͘ű̵̼͜͜ ̶̨̨̝̟̘̱͇̲̻̪̊͂̽̈̒͊f̴̱̐͌̌̓̋̔́̀͝i̶͖̤͎̬̝̦͒̂g̸̳̰̟̀̓̽̈́̐h̸̼͍̮͎̊̅͗͊̈͋̽̀͘t̴͔͚́̓,̷̨̧̱̠̙̠̙̱̒̍̽̾ ̷̖̰̼̬̟͐̊̂t̶̖̄͂̅̃̍͐̊̑̅͜͝h̴̢̛͙̪̞̫̝̺̋̅̿͛̇̚͝͝ͅͅȩ̶͉̤͍̠́̈͑̏͋̚͘͝ ̸̢̨̧͚̖̤̪̬̪̀̉̐͗̂͆͑̚̕̚c̴̠̩̳͎̲̪͔̟̈́͂̉͑́l̶̡̲̻̣̘̏́ͅo̶̢̧͔͈̬̳̰͈̝̻͌̋̆̃͒͗̏͘ş̴̪̺̣̥̎̽̿͗̒́͛̕̚̚e̴̺͍̤͖͂̇͑͂̋͂̆̾r̴̨̩̈́͋͠ ̷̧͚̲̩̖̋͒̉́͗y̶̘̖̝̑̈͊ǒ̵͚̽u̵͎͍̇̀̏̊̕͝ŕ̷͎̜̘͙̀̋ ̶͇̲̝̞̖̝̣̘̝̬͋d̷͔͈͔̀̿õ̴̝̯͇̹̘̏͗͜ö̵͚͓͆m̵͉̦̫̥̦̞̫͐̆͐̿͊͒͌͋͜.̷̼͈̻̥̜̾̏͐̾̐͆͘͜
You gasp, as you startle awake, and open your eyes for the first time in a long time.
no subject
Ah. That makes sense.
[Drawing on Meridian’s power feels perhaps a little warmer than using magic back home did, but it is largely the same, Liem’s found—even to the extent that he’d found himself unable to tap his magic during the brief period he spent in Zenith, when he’d lost faith after the Iconoclast Oracle.
Once he’s cleared the doorway itself, Liem re-latches the door. For now, hopefully any further wandering zombies will continue to be foiled by the basic mechanisms of a doorknob.
Then he looks back at Matt, a little surprised.]
No, that was it.
[Surely that was it, right? Only, he thinks again about what he said to Matt and he has to admit to himself that he might be missing some context.]
Or, well… perhaps you still don’t know? That I’m half-vampire. I never told the other you, but I think he must have realized it.
[Liem’s cheeks tint just the slightest bit when he says this. They’d had sex, so… surely Horos-Matt couldn’t have avoided noticing.]
no subject
He's not sure what he was expecting Liem to say, but half-vampire clearly surprises him. Matt blinks up from the body he's currently trying to maneuver into some semblance of dignified rest. ]
Half? [ he says--and immediately winces. Liem looks ... well, he can't really read his expression, but he's sure he's made him uncomfortable. ] I'm sorry, that's so rude of me. It's more of a binary thing where I'm from, is all.
[ All vampire-on-vampire gatekeeping aside, you either are one or you aren't. ]
But ah--okay. That's why you--I mean, you're conscientious, clearly. About people. [ Hence Liem's fretting over him and his disastrous decisions. Liem's respect for the dead. ]
no subject
It’s fine.
[Matt’s surprise comes as no real shock, even if he doesn’t recall ever discussing this with Matt in Horos. It isn’t as though half-vampire was a normal thing to be in Taldor, either.]
It’s why I’m familiar with vampires, [he says slowly, not entirely sure if that is what Matt was trying to say. Liem straightens from the last of the corpses, looking down the hall towards him.] I wanted to help you because when I arrived in Horos, when I was naked and alone, you were kind to me.
no subject
I see, [ he says. What is it with showing up naked to these places? Something about rebirth, something about transformation. When you get right down to it, what's the difference between a seed pod and a chrysalis? ] That's good. I'm glad I did that--he did that.
[ Matt smiles faintly, wistfully almost. He shakes his head. ]
I don't think anyone deserves to feel alone, especially someplace like--what that place sounded like. [ And of course, Liem has expressed his doubts that this place is much better. ] Things are already so hard.
no subject
I know. Things are better for me, here. I have my faith, and people to rely on. I hope you find that, also.
Organically, I mean. [For a moment, his expression turns wry and he seems perhaps a little bashful.] I hope it’s not unwelcome that I have a liking for you when you barely know me, [says local area’s most reserved man. Five minutes ago he was trying to ditch Matt because he didn’t want to fraternize with the enemy.]
no subject
No, no. Of course it's not--it's very welcome. [ He steps closer again, this time brushing his fingertips lightly to Liem's elbow. Maybe Liem's oversaturated on physical contact by now, but it's the best way Matt can think to communicate genuinely. A crooked smile curls his mouth as he admits, ] I like you too.
[ Truly, Matt doesn't understand Liem's exact meaning. He takes the remark about being unwelcome as a sign that he, Matt, has been a little too weird, trying to parse why Liem might care what happens to him. And he does like Liem. Ever since he felt that first moth-flutter in his mind, soft through the darkness, he's liked him. ]
no subject
He finds himself smiling a little, fond, at the light brush of fingers at his elbow. It’s nice to see Matt this way: warm and curious, not beaten down by the weight of crippling depression.]
In the spirit of truthfulness, I feel I should confess that we did have sex.
[Even if it was another version of Matt, and quite honestly another version of Liem as well, for all that no alternate universes were involved. He had been so lonely, and so desperate for comfort. Probably both of them were—not to mention fairly drunk, besides.
Even so, he still doesn’t regret that it happened.]
no subject
And he laughs, startled and pleased. ]
Oh my God, we did? [ Matt doesn't know what to do with himself. His thumb brushes Liem's elbow before he lets his hand fall back to his side; he beams. And with another crooked smile, a look that's half inside joke and half apology, he says, ] Gosh, I bet I threw myself at you.
[ As with Amos, Matt's definition of throwing himself at someone is a bit unreliable. It's a measure of internal affection rather than external flirtation. But as with Amos, Matt's positive it's true. ]
no subject
I suppose that depends on your definition. It was a few months after we met—not long before I was brought here.
[Did Matt think he might have been quicker on the draw than that? Or maybe he just envisions that was how long it took for Liem to say yes.]
I didn’t mean to keep this from you, [that Liem knows certain intimate details about him, like how does Matt taste and what kind of kisser is he,] it just seemed like an uncouth thing to lead with.
no subject
Oh, wow. That's nice. ]
Surprising restraint on my end, [ Matt muses, lips twitching. ] I guess the fate of the universe was still pretty dire back then. [ He shakes his head quickly, adding in a rush, ] Don't worry, seriously. I have things like that too, like--when's the right time to bring up the sex magic? I don't think I've ever timed it right once in my life, it's either too soon or way too late.
[ A pause. ]
Did I ever tell you about that? Other me?
no subject
Matt seems to expect Liem to know what he’s talking about, and though this could simply be an issue of it just never coming up between them in Horos, he nonetheless makes an effort to recall if he might simply have forgotten. It does seem like something he would remember, but…]
You did mention being able to… open up a connection with people you’re touching. Is that the sort of thing you mean?
[Yeah, no; the sex magic didn’t come up until about a week after Liem’s last memory of Horos, sadly.]
no subject
[ He smiles at Liem, a touch awkward now, and scrubs a hand over his scarred left cheek. ]
That's definitely something I can do ... okay, I have a clean sweep on never timing this right. Um. Sex magic specifically is more a way I know to generate magical energy. The spells themselves aren't any sexier, but using the energy from--a kiss, or what have you--I find it a lot faster and generally more powerful.
[ Now that he's put it that way, was it ... uncool of him to not bring up sex magic before now? It could've spared them some close calls during this zombie fight. ]
no subject
The explanation is, in the end, fairly straightforward.]
Ah… so rather than a spellcasting area, it’s more akin to a spell component?
[Some part of him had been expecting aphrodisiac charms or lube conjuration or something. That seems pretty silly once he hears how grounded the actual answer is.]
I can see how that might be useful in some circumstances. Though, probably not in this one. [Unless Matt is intending to try sneaking a kiss in between zombie fights.]
no subject
[ Okay, now Matt definitely feels like he was holding out by not mentioning it before. ]
I would've said something sooner, [ he adds, sheepish. ] I definitely don't want to put either of us at risk. It's just, um, it's such an intimate thing by nature. I wouldn't even know how to ask somebody who I didn't know was attracted to me and wanted to act on it.
[ Hence his offers to Tezcatlipoca. ]
no subject
[When Matt had cast his spell before they opened that door, perhaps he might have said something then. And maybe after the drain of his prior spellcasting, he might wish to consider leaning on this extra resource before they descend properly.
Liem shakes his head, trying to look reassuring.]
It’s fine, really. You don’t need to worry about me; the dead can’t tell I’m here. They’re not aware enough to understand what’s happening when I touch them.
And… I haven’t actually… [He hesitates, a little shy about broaching this topic out loud, even if there’s no one around to hear. He’s never had to actually admit the particulars of his personal life to anyone before.] I haven’t discussed this sort of thing with Set, explicitly.
[Kissing people who aren’t him, he means. Part of him assumes Set would be okay with it, because he certainly doesn’t expect the god to refrain from kissing people other than him—but especially given Set’s history with his wife, he doesn’t want to do anything he can’t undo.]
no subject
[ His turn to blush. ]
I'm sorry, I'm making assumptions now. I'm a different person than the other guy, and we're in different circumstances, so if you weren't interested in like, your mouth making contact with my mouth again, totally understand.
no subject
There’s a slight pause before he actually responds. Matt brings up a great point, in that not only is their present relationship (such as it is) different from the one Liem had with Matt in Horos, but also Liem hasn’t seriously given thought to the idea of being intimate with another person since Set bullied his way into being… if not his partner, than certainly his something.]
I will consider it, [is what he says after that small hesitation. There’s also the matter of Matt evidently being one of Zenith’s shard-bearers, but this seems like a small matter compared to the others, especially given that he’s not sure how dedicated Matt even is to their cause.] You’re a charming young man, and I don’t doubt I would enjoy it. Besides which, [he smiles faintly,] I’m flattered by your interest, considering how briefly you’ve known me.
no subject
I guess it has been pretty brief, [ Matt allows. ] It only feels like I've been here for a hundred years. [ hahahaha get it, get i He shakes his head ruefully, and adds in a slightly shyer tone, ] Maybe it's because I was so new to communion, but the first time you talked to me--when you said my name--
I don't know.
[ Matt wonders if there are strings of sympathy that connect him and the other him, and if important input can resonate between them. People, memories. Maybe there are even more of him out there, passing the odd mycorrhizal intuition through the network of their roots. Quantum theory suggests at least some of this is possible.
That's not what Matt feels he has to address at the moment, however. ]
I'm a charming young man? [ he redirects. His lips quirk. ] You've got some distinguished gray, but I can't believe you're that much older than me.
no subject
Embarrassing, even if Matt doesn’t find it objectionable. Particularly since Liem is already entangled with another man.
Fortunately, the current topic provides a nice distraction from that line of thought. Liem raises an eyebrow.]
You are a young man. [Nobody who could refer to themselves ten years past as being “a kid” can claim to not be a young man, in Liem’s estimation. Liem suspects that Matt is somewhere in his early twenties, but even if he’s undershooting, he can’t be off by that much.] And I’m old enough to be your great-grandfather.
[More than, in all likelihood.]
no subject
I'm twenty-five, [ Matt protests. His eyes narrow for old enough to be your great-grandfather, like Liem's proposed a riddle that Matt's obliged to solve before they move on. Then they widen again. ] Oh my God, you're not secretly a thousand, are you? I run into a lot of those around here. Wait, don't tell me; I bet you're ...
[ He looks at Liem as if scanning his very soul. (Mostly he's checking for wrinkles.) ]
One hundred and eight.
no subject
You’re close, actually.
[Surprisingly close, given that Matt initially supposed he might actually be a thousand. Liem very sincerely hopes that he won’t live that long; he thinks existing for so many generations among humans as they live and die might do unwelcome things to his mind.]
About fifteen years short. [Then, after a pause, he asks curiously,] Why one hundred and eight?
no subject
[ Matt shakes his head, slightly bashful once again. ]
One hundred and eight is a sacred number in Hinduism--uhh, a religion from my world. The diameter of our sun was about 108 times the diameter of the earth, the distance between the earth and our moon was about 108 times the diameter of the moon. There's all kinds of astrological and spiritual confluences like that, so. [ He smiles. ] It seemed like a good guess.
no subject
One hundred and twenty-three, [he confirms after only a slight pause. Then he adds, a little dryly,] Flattered though I am by the comparison, I’m not a celestial body.
[He’s a living man, and his age gets further from one hundred and eight with every passing year.]
no subject
[ He shakes his head. Mentally, Matt's taking inventory of himself: his energy level, his ease and range of movement. He's definitely still tired, but the surprising turn in the conversation has given him something of a second wind.
Which is good news, because their time in this world is getting shorter by the minute. ]
Well. You're pretty spry for over a hundred, [ Matt concludes with a small grin. ] I might be holding you back, actually. But it does occur to me that if we use the space down here the right way, maybe I could draw some of these things to me and you could pick them off?
[ Look, Matt's a newcomer to combat. But as an urban planning student, he knows a thing or two about patterns of foot traffic. ]