She'd tried to be, in Horos. After the first encounter with the Innocence in Venera, she had tried to end it. She had tried to slit her stomach open rather than live in that world she didn't belong in, confronted constantly with what she saw as insanity, insult, or impossible. But that hadn't worked. The shards kept them alive, and every time she had tried to shatter it she became so sick that she physically could not go through with it. And so she'd thrown herself into any violent confrontation with the secret hope that she wouldn't survive- that she could find a death that was worthy of a warrior.
She hadn't. Even here... the shards kept them alive once more. But this time... this time she had seen her world in a bead. Another impossibility, and yet... It sustained her more than anything in Horos ever had. It meant she did have to stay alive... and to do that, to pursue that vision she had seen...
Hayame does not turn around. But she does answer.]
... Call upon me, then, if you have a mission that needs completing.
[She would see it done, no matter who she had to work with or what she had to do with herself. She would repay the debt he had forced on her in service, because it was all she had. And if he did encounter her again... well, the debt could get bigger by another sandwich-worth.]
cw: suicidal ideation
She'd tried to be, in Horos. After the first encounter with the Innocence in Venera, she had tried to end it. She had tried to slit her stomach open rather than live in that world she didn't belong in, confronted constantly with what she saw as insanity, insult, or impossible. But that hadn't worked. The shards kept them alive, and every time she had tried to shatter it she became so sick that she physically could not go through with it. And so she'd thrown herself into any violent confrontation with the secret hope that she wouldn't survive- that she could find a death that was worthy of a warrior.
She hadn't. Even here... the shards kept them alive once more. But this time... this time she had seen her world in a bead. Another impossibility, and yet... It sustained her more than anything in Horos ever had. It meant she did have to stay alive... and to do that, to pursue that vision she had seen...
Hayame does not turn around. But she does answer.]
... Call upon me, then, if you have a mission that needs completing.
[She would see it done, no matter who she had to work with or what she had to do with herself. She would repay the debt he had forced on her in service, because it was all she had. And if he did encounter her again... well, the debt could get bigger by another sandwich-worth.]
]