[Bitter hopelessness, at least, she would understand. It is the happiness that escapes her comprehension. Even though Matsukaze had told her he wanted her to live in a world where she could feel happy, and not ashamed, over the simple act of being alive... What did that mean? Why, why had she been ripped from the world she belonged to this place before he could tell her how to do that? Before she could kill herself in his arms so that she did not need to wonder what those words meant... and what they meant could have happened, if she hadn't ruined everything.]
...
[She regrets already that she had asked him. It put such a weakness on display, and it meant she would need to say more, and the more she spoke the more it would be clear that she doesn't know... anything about how people should speak to one another as equals, anything that wasn't the path of a warrior.]
How can a-
[A cripple. ... But she does not call him that. He had given her half a sandwich, and now she is a jinba with one eye. If she says "how can one man change a world", she is sure he will say the same as so many have before him. Something ridiculous about how if they all just worked together, something about the power of bonds and friendship... her sharp teeth nip harshly into her lip and her fingers curl into impotent fists.
She shouldn't have said anything. How foolish-]
- I wish you luck.
[She reaches down, retrieving her half-eaten rabbit. Perhaps with something better in her stomach she can now hold off on her cravings long enough to cook it.]
cw: ableism
...
[She regrets already that she had asked him. It put such a weakness on display, and it meant she would need to say more, and the more she spoke the more it would be clear that she doesn't know... anything about how people should speak to one another as equals, anything that wasn't the path of a warrior.]
How can a-
[A cripple. ... But she does not call him that. He had given her half a sandwich, and now she is a jinba with one eye. If she says "how can one man change a world", she is sure he will say the same as so many have before him. Something ridiculous about how if they all just worked together, something about the power of bonds and friendship... her sharp teeth nip harshly into her lip and her fingers curl into impotent fists.
She shouldn't have said anything. How foolish-]
- I wish you luck.
[She reaches down, retrieving her half-eaten rabbit. Perhaps with something better in her stomach she can now hold off on her cravings long enough to cook it.]
My gratitude for the meal.