I can tell you what happens next. [He crosses his arms, jerking his chin toward the guy with the mullet carrying his sorry ass in a fireman's carry as he passes out for a few moments.]

He'll sit me next to him on that vehicle that should be around there. [A vague motion in a military truck's direction.] He's going to try to take me to Headquarters, but not without a detour. I'll lose consciousness after a while, but not before berating them both for not doing their job.