[ a fool is putting it lightly—at least, maybe if it were any other person like Childe. while the young harbinger is a lot of things, an individual with 'debt owed' he is not.
(there's the other thing, too, that may come to benefit Vander with time if things go well: that is the strange feeling Childe has bleeding in his chest all the way to find 'help,' to get himself stitched up and hurry on back because any 'help' is already out there searching for the creature. it's a sensation that bewilders him, and he doesn't have the slightest clue what it's supposed to be or what he should feel about it existing, but for now their relationship isn't strong enough that Childe thinks he'll be dwelling on it long.)
Vander saved his life without a doubt. Why he did it doesn't matter, and at the very least the fatui harbinger realizes that going back for the older man isn't simply paying his dues but it's... the right thing to do (what he wants to do.)
there's no hope lingering in his mind, of course. he's a realist when it comes to the battlefield and has had way too much experience for anyone to have for several lifetimes combined, so he knows that a wound like that will bleed out very quickly even if 'Manon' left him be as soon as Childe bolted. so when he finds the spot (—he pushes himself best he can despite it being stressful on his system with his own blood loss, but at least he's stitched up and pushing his limits is what he does best—) he isn't surprised it is dark and silent. he moves around the area, feeling around for and smelling for the blood and torched wood and vines as the narrowing beacon before he finally is able to spot the faint glimmer of what must be (hopes is) a shard.
he hyper listens to his surroundings, walking with a steady determination towards the small light until he's able to find it in a pool of bloody mud from where Vander's body had been. crouching down, he reaches to pick it up only because he has gloves on (he doesn't want Vander to feel any worse than he must already after a death like that) that will lessen any sensations exchanged between a soul and an individual holding it. ]
...You died out here alone, and for what? Someone like me? I wonder if...
[ he gets to his feet now, looking around before heading back towards the camp. ]
...you'll regret that.
[ as childe walks, the turmoil of emotions rains heavy on him, him choosing silence despite their roar and counting his steps and breathing to ensure he doesn't stumble along the way from any vertigo related to pain or blood. when he gets back to the encampment, however, he looks around.
when he had mentioned Vander's name, no one in particular came forward as knowing him particularly well that he would be able to turn the shard over to. while he could just hand it to a harmonized Meridian... something about that feels wrong. ]
...Is there no one here to welcome you back?
[ Without a word, he settles in silence in the encampment until morning, gently wrapping the shard in his scarf as he does so. He'll take it to the Tree, but he can't be there to welcome the older man back to life.
( somehow, that's truly bitter in Childe's mouth.
—even though he'd only expect such a reality if this was the other way around. ) ]
no subject
(there's the other thing, too, that may come to benefit Vander with time if things go well: that is the strange feeling Childe has bleeding in his chest all the way to find 'help,' to get himself stitched up and hurry on back because any 'help' is already out there searching for the creature. it's a sensation that bewilders him, and he doesn't have the slightest clue what it's supposed to be or what he should feel about it existing, but for now their relationship isn't strong enough that Childe thinks he'll be dwelling on it long.)
Vander saved his life without a doubt. Why he did it doesn't matter, and at the very least the fatui harbinger realizes that going back for the older man isn't simply paying his dues but it's... the right thing to do (what he wants to do.)
there's no hope lingering in his mind, of course. he's a realist when it comes to the battlefield and has had way too much experience for anyone to have for several lifetimes combined, so he knows that a wound like that will bleed out very quickly even if 'Manon' left him be as soon as Childe bolted. so when he finds the spot (—he pushes himself best he can despite it being stressful on his system with his own blood loss, but at least he's stitched up and pushing his limits is what he does best—) he isn't surprised it is dark and silent. he moves around the area, feeling around for and smelling for the blood and torched wood and vines as the narrowing beacon before he finally is able to spot the faint glimmer of what must be (hopes is) a shard.
he hyper listens to his surroundings, walking with a steady determination towards the small light until he's able to find it in a pool of bloody mud from where Vander's body had been. crouching down, he reaches to pick it up only because he has gloves on (he doesn't want Vander to feel any worse than he must already after a death like that) that will lessen any sensations exchanged between a soul and an individual holding it. ]
...You died out here alone, and for what? Someone like me? I wonder if...
[ he gets to his feet now, looking around before heading back towards the camp. ]
...you'll regret that.
[ as childe walks, the turmoil of emotions rains heavy on him, him choosing silence despite their roar and counting his steps and breathing to ensure he doesn't stumble along the way from any vertigo related to pain or blood. when he gets back to the encampment, however, he looks around.
when he had mentioned Vander's name, no one in particular came forward as knowing him particularly well that he would be able to turn the shard over to. while he could just hand it to a harmonized Meridian... something about that feels wrong. ]
...Is there no one here to welcome you back?
[ Without a word, he settles in silence in the encampment until morning, gently wrapping the shard in his scarf as he does so. He'll take it to the Tree, but he can't be there to welcome the older man back to life.
( somehow, that's truly bitter in Childe's mouth.
—even though he'd only expect such a reality if this was the other way around. ) ]