( though they have not experienced many of them, there are times where falling back on characteristic silence is just as wounding as a horribly honest answer might be.
in this moment, makoto finds himself inflicted with both.
time passes, and he's still. quiet. his expression is static, stunned, but as his mind works through what dextera has said and the implications therein, it slowly shifts and changes to pantomime a stage play of what he feels deep, deep within the shadowed and echoing chamber of his chest, in those desolate reaches where the thing that stood to be his heart resided: a tenseness around his eyes belying disbelief, then an increased hollow wanness to his complexion as callous claws are sunk deep into tender internal wounds he knows will never properly heal. )
You - ...You'd just allow yourself to be taken by him?
( he does sense that it is a choice that dextera doesn't believe he's making. dimly, ever-so-dimly, he recalls the false wings of a man who had woven a venomous and ensnaring net of words to curse and bind them together. hate makes this recollection oddly concise.
but, to makoto, who has struggled tooth and nail against the impossibly impervious forces that have buffeted his feeble frame for the entirety of all of his different attempts at life, it is something entirely different. to passively leave himself up to that, to not fight furiously for the chance of anything else, is in and of itself a choice to neglect it. )
(1/2)
in this moment, makoto finds himself inflicted with both.
time passes, and he's still. quiet. his expression is static, stunned, but as his mind works through what dextera has said and the implications therein, it slowly shifts and changes to pantomime a stage play of what he feels deep, deep within the shadowed and echoing chamber of his chest, in those desolate reaches where the thing that stood to be his heart resided: a tenseness around his eyes belying disbelief, then an increased hollow wanness to his complexion as callous claws are sunk deep into tender internal wounds he knows will never properly heal. )
You - ...You'd just allow yourself to be taken by him?
( he does sense that it is a choice that dextera doesn't believe he's making. dimly, ever-so-dimly, he recalls the false wings of a man who had woven a venomous and ensnaring net of words to curse and bind them together. hate makes this recollection oddly concise.
but, to makoto, who has struggled tooth and nail against the impossibly impervious forces that have buffeted his feeble frame for the entirety of all of his different attempts at life, it is something entirely different. to passively leave himself up to that, to not fight furiously for the chance of anything else, is in and of itself a choice to neglect it. )